Friday, August 29, 2008


Insecurity is like a parasite that lives in my throat. It keeps me from having a voice, from speaking clearly, or from speaking at all. It makes my mouth stiff when I talk, making me even more aware of myself. It is causing me to resist even writing this post.

Finding a social group seems impossible when you can barely speak to people. I don't hate people. It would be easier to hate them. I fear them. I fear making a fool of myself. I fear being an awkward mess. I feel really lonely sometimes because of fear, and I hate that. I resent myself for being this way. I rarely find people (actual people anyways) that I feel like I can connect with, that have similar values, and opinions that I have. I am very fortunate to have found a mate that I can connect with, otherwise I'd feel totally alone.

I'm sure that everyone feels this way sometimes.


Friday, August 22, 2008

Project ADD

Friday, August 15, 2008

Last Day of Summer

It's a sad sad day. But not so sad.

Summer is over. We've been through alot this summer. Got a new, wonderful house. We started our rental project. We endured the loss of a pet. We got a new/old pet.

Today I'm getting my FlyLady on. I love the FlyLady, she is so encouraging.

School starts monday. One more semester closer to graduation.

Wednesday, August 6, 2008

Fat Squirrels

We have the fattest squirrels I've ever seen. As they leap from tree to tree, they drag the poor limbs down, nearly breaking them. When their fat little asses jump on the roof, it sounds like Santa's Sleigh has come in for a landing. They are fat from eating pecans from the several pecan trees on our property. They will undoubtedly winter well.

We got the "Rainbow Bridge" card today. It was nice, but it is kind of like a twist of the knife. For anyone who doesn't know what Rainbow Bridge is, it's a place that pets go (according to the card) to wait for you when you die. And when you have to put an animal to sleep, the vet's office always sends you the Rainbow Bridge card, which you receive just as you are getting over the grief of losing you're pet.

We also inherited Angel. She is the dog of my youth, and my parents have been trying to get us to take her ever since we got our own place. They conveniently went on vacay and needed someone to take care of her. I doubt, however, that they will be back to retrieve her, which is just as well, since they treat her like a red-headed stepchild. Since she has been at my house, she has been a very good little girl, not peeing on the carpet and such. She has also been shaved, as she has a very thick, long coat that is cruel to leave her in in the hot weather. She is now naked as she came, and is much easier to keep clean, and doesn't shed.

So that's all of my animal news. Ta ta.